Man. That soapbox is hard to kick out from under a person, isn’t it? So. Play, good. My sister brought along her kiddo, my niece. She’s almost two now and super cute and has begun to string short sentences together, indicate possession (beyond “mine” that is) and recognize people from afar or by picture. She’s quite polite as well. She studies things still, and imitates things people say without knowing what they mean, and she also babbles along not saying anything in particular. This is probably the most interactive she’s been and … I found I missed her when I had to leave.
However, even in awe of that little sprite’s ceeeeeyuuuutest age-stage, I staunchly decided I’m never having kids. Way too much work, require too much attention, and they rely way too much on you. I don’t want any of those things in any aspect of my life. I require a lot, a LOT of independence, and I felt like saying so aloud, which is as to be expected after watching 1776.
My sister posited I am almost too independent (in reference to my resistance to dating anyone seriously or wanting to have a family). I don’t think her comment was judgmental at all, but I had some thoughts. First, there’s no such thing as too independent. Second, there sure the fuck ain’t no such thing (ignore the double negative) as too independent. Third, I’m tired of societal pressure to have kids. There are plenty of people on this planet and I think women who’re like “nah, I’m good” should be rewarded and not brow-beaten by society into thinking there’s something wrong with them. I’m thinking logically, y’all, not with my lady-hormones. A friend of mine suggested childless people should have non-baby showers where we get gifts for not bringing another resource-suck into the world. Though I suppose it could be argued that every day without having to pour all your money, time and attention into an investment that may never pan out is a party…and all those vacations we’ll have money to take, and the freedom to move wherever and whenever we want, the sights we’ll see that aren’t the back of the line at Disneyland…
So mommies, you’re not better than me. You just made different choices. It’s revolution up in this bitch, because for a long time I would always say, “oh maybe I’ll want kids someday,” like maybe the dude I’m with or my biological clock or something will change my mind. They likely won’t. I can’t say for sure, of course, because life is a roller-coaster if you’re lucky, but today, I’m saying the baby train ends here.
Revolution, I say! When I go to my first non-baby party, and perhaps after I coin a way better term for it, I’ll feel like the war’s been won. But all you non-kid-having ladies out there, hold your heads up. Nobody should tell you you’re wrong, least of all society and even less than that, your family. There are other ladies like you. We’re growing in number, though probably exponentially slower than those who’re into kids, and we’ll just have to figure a way to get our voices heard.